Okay, Internet. Let's just keep this between us. A lot of people expect biting sarcasm and eyerolling from me, because that's the niche I fill these days. I say something that sets up everyone else's punchlines.
To paraphrase one such situation: "I think Twilight is the bestest movie," says Friend. I reply, "Yeah. Let's take a hundred years of vampire myths and stories and throw them all out the window. We'll make Vampires shine like painted whores, and Native Americans wolves." Cue other Friend, who is herself Native American. "Yeah, I had no idea I could turn into a wolf. You guys are screwed if I ever get mad." I'm not sure that's exactly how it went, but it was something along those lines, and I seem to recall Chappaboogie saying something about eating us, and not in the sexy way.
That said, I can't remember the last time I said anything interesting without being prompted, and then immediately interrupted. I laugh at every joke, but I have no humor to call my own. I have pleasant, boring stories, and people generally stop listening to me after about 15 seconds. My voice is not unpleasant; my podcast listeners seem to like it. I suppose it could just be my inability to carry on conversations about popular subjects. My interests are highly limited these days: anime, WoW, beer, blogging, podcasting, a few books, and my dog. My friends' interests tend more toward the mainstream, with the notable exception of Horror movies, which are really not my thing.
I guess when someone says "you won't believe what I saw when I was out riding my bike by the river," they don't really want to get the response "you won't believe what I saw while I was flying from Dragonblight to Icecrown on my Red Drake." What does baffle me is that I can't get anyone to discuss books either. I read and some of my friends read, but none of us get together and discuss reading. I guess a loud bar isn't really a place to get into a discussion about Richard Dawkins' fallacious arguments against intelligent design.
Oh well. I guess there's something to be said for predictability. I must enjoy not being part of conversations when sober, because I keep letting it happen. Only when I imbibe alcohol do I ever say, "Hey! Don't start another conversation in the middle of a conversation with me!" In the end, it boils down to one of two things: 1) I am not interesting or 2) My friends have the attention spans of goldfish. In some cases, 1 is probably true, and in others, 2 is most CERTAINLY true. I love my girlfriends dearly, but I frequently feel like a 5th, 6th, or 7th wheel.
Thank goodness I don't base my self worth on people paying attention to me, right? (I run 3 blogs and a podcast...) Oh well, I have to go to a townhall meeting for work now. I'm sure I'll post something later that is less whiny.
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