Remembery.

This post is dedicated to the year 2008, and the fact that I am incredibly bored with nothing at all to do at work today. My memory is not at all what it used to be, and I can say with utter honesty that I cannot remember what I was doing in January. I know that I worked, and that the contents of my desk at work have not changed very much. I know what product I was working on, as I still have all my documentation. I do NOT, however, have any idea what my home situation was, or the status of my friendships (with one notable exception) or who I was dating. Was I even dating? You get the idea. So for this year's recap, I am using lines from my blog to document each month. That is why I started this thing in the first place.

January - Apparently I kept Mason's dog for a week. This is when my carpet was destroyed. I also saw Play! and seethed angrily about the crowd in attendance.
February - Apparently I did nothing until the end of the month, at which point I went to a potluck and a zombie party. Did I go out for Valentine's day? I haven't a clue.
March - THE PILOWS! AAAAAAHHH! Amazing show. I actually remember it. I also went on a date to a comedy show.
April - Eddie Izzard show! Laughs! Merryment! Hilarity! Started a podcast! A homecoming, and celebratory meat. I got a doggie and she is the cutest little wuggy uggy smushyface. Busy month.
May - Failed an audition for a voice acting gig. Apparently I didn't do anything else.
June - Anime convention, Indian Food, and retarded work people.
July - I went to an aquarium. Hold back your excitement. Fireworks went off and were loud. Everyone's A Little Bit Racist. Uncle Lew has lost his funny.
August - Armin van Buuren. This show was awesome. I got to dance like a lunatic, and nobody even glanced at me.
September - Got to see my faraway friends in Toronto, ON. Miss you guys!
October - I think there were some parties, and I hugged my doggie.
November - I entered quarter life crisis mode. Other people also had birthdays. As I said, contentment does not breed decent blog posts.
December - Mingo Fishtrap, Jim Gaffigan, Chris Onstad, new computer, Scientology, and Christmas.

Apparently, it has been a very lovely year. Cheers, and I'll see you in '09.

The Holidays

Father Christmas, Grandfather Time, and the New Year's Baby. What possesses us to personify every abstract concept? These are the three that relate to this time of year, but there are numerous others. I always thought we did it to accommodate our limited brains, and give them something with which to associate abstractions. Lately, however, I've started running with a different theory: we personify everything because if it's "like" us, maybe we can have some limited control over it. This is my main theory, but I also secretly think the people who came up with these personas for holiday people are the same people who put on animal costumes and have sex with each other. Just a theory.

Right! So Christmas was yesterday, and it was so lovely. Christmas eve was lovely also! The list of attendees is as follows (I will forget if I do not list them): Mom, Dad, Grandma, Aunt + husband, Uncle + wife (Illinois), Cousin + husband and twins (San Antonio), Great Aunt, Great Aunt's son + wife, Mom's second cousin's wife (husband sick), Art + Jeanette (family friends), and me + doggie. A big crowd, but a nice one. I love my family so much. We got out a puzzle to put together, but everyone's older now, and they don't seem interested in sticking around after it gets dark. The kids were fantastic with Maizie. They took in a stray dog recently, so they are learning about pets, but their dog is much more active than poor Maizie. She was a little trooper though. As long as I was nearby, she let the little kids pet her. She fell in love with my Grandma. Later on after most of the people had left, Grandma picked her up and held her for awhile, and she was just the happiest thing.

I guess I'll mention my swag, though it isn't the most important part of the holiday at all. The presents list: computer speakers, mp3 player, book, Rock Band 2, a nail trimmer device thingy for my dog, and some money. All I asked for were the speakers, so my parents really went overboard! I hope they didn't spend much on the mp3 player. I know how much the other stuff cost, and I'm slightly miffed that they spent all that money, since they're in the process of building a new house. Oh well. I'll ne'er complain loudly about extra presents. Protests are courtesy only ;)! Well, that's about all I've got. I wasn't going to post, but there is NOTHING to do at work, so yeah. Ta ta!

Spite-filled Pre-Christmas Rant

I'd just like to take a minute to say it was nice to know you all. I've had a good run keeping up (somewhat) with this blog, but I'll probably be completely unable to access the Internet at all aside from my company's website. Heck, I might even be banned from that. If I don't get fired, and blogger doesn't get blocked completely, then this post will just serve as a testament to my hatred for web blocking software.

If you, as a company, simply must block the Internet from your workers, please stick to things that might be harmful to your business. I can understand blocking myspace, because honestly, I hate it too. I can understand blocking filehosting sites. We don't want delicate company files uploaded anywhere, and we don't want scary viruses on our computers. I can mostly understand blocking YouTube, Hulu, Facebook, and even my beloved Twitter. But when I am searching for something that is business-related, and your stupid blocking software tags "batteriesnmore.com" (probably not a real site) as "sex" or "inappropriate content," I hold the IT department personally responsible for me being unable to do my job. This place makes me want to punch adorable things. Go ahead. Fire me. I don't even care that we're in a recession. I will work at effing Starbucks, where at least they don't block you from using the espresso machine.

Edit: A westie pile to make me feel better.

Okay, Christmas season may begin.

I've been resisting and pushing and kicking my feet like a child, but I will finally give in and open my Scroogey heart to the Christmas spirit. This weekend marked the first of several Christmas celebrations of which I will be part. Friday night, DSCarmon and I put together my new computer (Christmas gift to self). Saturday morning at from 8 to 1 pm I helped my mother decorate her Christmas tree. Thereafter I ran home, tidied up a bit, played with my dog briefly, changed clothes, ate a quick bite, and headed to Circle Theater for their production of A Very Merry Unauthorized Children's Scientology Pageant. I'd like to take a moment to discuss that with you, by the way. Have you heard about our lord and savior L. Ron Hubbard? The L stands for "love!" Right. Anyway, after that I went back to the house and made a sammich. Then I walked Maizie and then I got ready for the first Christmas party of the season. There was apparently a requirement to get presents, but I missed the memo (everyone missed the memo) so now I am scrambling to figure out thoughtful and not-too-expensive gifts for people. My poor wallet... My poooor, poor wallet.

Yesterday, I did some podcasting, took a nap, and went to lunch with my best friend from high school and her family. Cheesecake factory. Yum. YUUUUMMMMMM. Now I am back at work, and wish to be elsewhere. Whee! Bye now!

Remember, Remember the 6th of December

I haven't done much of note lately, but the past weekend was certainly fun! I saw Mingo Fishtrap live at McDavid Studio on Friday the 5th, and drove to Austin to see Jim Gaffigan perform and go to a book signing for Chris Onstad. The drive home was difficult, as we didn't leave the book signing until midnight. Upon my return, I spent one day healthy, and the next two sick. Here it is Thursday already, and I haven't had much of a week. Looking on the brightside, it's only 2 days until the Very Merry Unofficial Scientology pageant. I'm terribly excited to watch 12-year-olds make fun of Scientology. Then there is a party of Christmases, and Sunday I will see my old high school friend that I haven't seen since last Christmas! Wheefun! This is the busiest time of year. Deck the halls and run around nekkid. I probably won't post until after Christmas. Later, Internet.

That's so hot

I just got the WORST news. Apparently, the Amazon Kindle 2 (or whatever they'll eventually call it) has been delayed until Q1 2009. That makes me sad. It's okay though.

Big news of the week: I am going to buy a new computar! Or maybe a condominium! It depends on interest rates! I am so excited either way! I am going to exclaim everything for the rest of this post (ok not really)!

So last weekend was Chrissie's birthday, and I think we all had a really good time. I know she did, and since it was her birthday, that's what counts! I determined something interesting yesterday. The problem facing my generation is impermanence. Nothing is stable these days. Not our houses, not our jobs, and certainly not our families. Unemployment rates are rising, housing market is falling, and the divorce rate is still ridiculously high. There's something to be said for stability. Even if you're a wild, crazy, spontaneous person, fear of the unknown can and will still keep you from being at peace. That's my deep thought for the day. I'll lighten up one of these days, I promise!

Question of the day

Poll time, courtesy of DSCarmon: Do you think there's a black friday fetish group on the internet that can only get it up by pretending it's black friday?

Responses, I expect, will vary between "Yes," "No," and "Please die in a fire, you creepy weirdo."

WHeEEeeeeEEEEe Tuesday!

That Thing Between Your Ears

I think Bill Hicks had it right when he said "the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas. " I'd say that's a fairly accurate description of the blogging phenomenon. Well, if it can be called such...

But anyway... My birthday week has concluded and I have ushered in my quarterlife with warmth, family, and friendship. From Wednesday to Sunday, I did not pay for a meal. It was quite fantastic.

Thanks to all my wondermus friends for coming to my party, which was more dinner and beers and just good conversation. I guess that's what adult parties are. I dunno... I have a hard time calling anything a party where Rock Band is not played, a household item is not broken, and no one calls your mother a prostitute. OHHHHH!

Right! So good times abound. Life is grand, and that doesn't make for very good journalblogging.

English Breakfast Tea

Since my life has been inherently uninteresting since my last post, I have decided to discuss the merits and methods of English Breakfast Tea at work. As it is breakfast time, I feel this is appropriate.

According to legend (the back of my box of Twinnings' English Breakfast Tea), English Breakfast Tea was "originally blended to complement the traditional, hearty English breakfast, from which its name derives." Now, I don't have scrambled eggs, bacon, sausages, black pudding, mushrooms, baked beans, hash browns, and half a tomato, but I do have this trusty granola bar. English Breakfast Tea is a black tea blend, and it is full of deliciousness and versatility. It is fantastic with milk and/or sugar. I usually put a spoonful of sugar in it, possibly two if I'm in a mood. Since I'm at work, I've got to brew one cup at a time, and use the little instant bags. My method is as follows:

1. Insert tea bag into cup
2. Pour hot water into cup (use machine in break area)
3. Stir in spoonful or two of sugar
4. Let tea sit, covered with napkin/paper towel until I remember it's there
5. Remove tea bag. Set aside if I think I will want another cup
6. Drink until tea is cool, then add more hot water to finish

Why drink tea instead of coffee to wake up? Simply put, I think coffee tastes like boiled poop with a helping of dirty laundry, and smells the same. Or, to quote Patton Oswalt, it smells like dirt that's been f***ed by a hobo. Tea, if steeped for an appropriate time, tastes like heaven threw up in my mouth. It's wonderful. It's warm. If it becomes less warm, just add a little bit of hot water. You can't do that with coffee. Tea is the best. You wanna disagree? I got a stabbin pencil with your name on it. HOOWAH.

I just wanted to let you know that human beings and being human are overrated.

That is all.

MEATSTRAVAGANZA ON SATURDAY. I will consume as much meat as possible.

SPOoooooooooooooon!

Or maybe that should be SPPOOOOOOOOOORE. That's why I'm tired today. Stupid videogames; making me all tired and stuff. Anyway, so how is my favorite internet today? Is hims being a good boy? Hmmm? Is hims?

Right, so what's important is that I survived the weekend. Friday, I went to Gingerman by myself and had a few drinkies. A cute, but awkward fellow started to strike up a conversation, but I am retarded and answered incorrectly to the question "do you like baseball?" and forever ruined any chances I might have had with this strong (geeky), silent (socially awkward) knight in shining armor (shorts and a plain t-shirt).

Saturday, I played with my cousin's twin 5-year-olds, and had delicious food at my aunt's house for my grandma's 84th birthday party. I actually stayed out later with my parents than I did at the bar, and later than I have been going to bed on weekends. Crazy.

Sunday I looked at condos, and had all my dreams dashed by the harsh realities of the current lending market. Just argh. Oh. Also, I took care of Chappaboogie's cats. One of them vomited a UFO-shaped pukedisk. It was kinda nasty. Bowie tried to eat my shoe. No lie. Devo hid, and I thought he had somehow escaped the apartment. That was about the most excitement I had all weekend, man, let me tell you. It's terrifying to think you've just LOST your friend's cat. Frak. Speaking of Frak, where's my new damn season of BSG, you tardbucket sci-fi geeks?

Now it's Tuesday, and I want to go home.

I'll keelaul ye, and throw yer bones to the fishes.

Pop a bottle o' grog and grab yer wench; it be Talk like a Pirate day. If ye already be a pirate, ye cen talk like a landlubber.

So lend me yer ears while I tell ye a tale of... oh screw it. It would take 3 hours to write my post that way. Anyway, this post is going to be short.

DSCARMON James, you look like a prison guard when you wear the following colors together:
Olive Shirt
Khaki Pants

Sorry, but that's the way it goes. And now, I'm off to posit theories about the continued and unjustly prolonged constipation of Floridian orange-growers. My luncheon discussions are just fascinating.

A Whole Neeew Wooooooorld

Geneva - The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) was successfully tested in Sweden for the first time today. Physicists from around the world hope to prove or disprove a number of theorems concerning the building blocks of matter in the universe. Special monitoring equipment, including hypersensetive microphones have been installed along the entire 17 Mile length. Though this is merely the testing phase for the LHC, scientists have already made a remarkable discovery.

It appears that when accelerated to very high speeds, electrons emit a tiny but audible noise that was described by Dr. Gordon Freeman as "Wheeeeee!" When asked to expound on this phenomenon, Dr. Freeman hypothesized that this was caused by the electrons "Having a good 'ol time." Our reporters tried to interview other sources, but The good Dr. kept our attention by further expounding that he heard a distinct "Oomf" when the particles collided, but this phenomena was not recorded, and would need further testing before verified.

"I'd like to push the particles into a beam in the test chamber," said Freeman in response to critics of the Large hadron Collider who have claimed it would cause a resonance cascade when activated at full capacity later this year.

-MacInaw Tully, Sept 10, 2008

Another day, another country.

Okay, this title isn't entirely accurate. I did not visit more than one country in the last 5 days. I went to Canada for 5! A pleasant surprise picked me up from the airport, but with him was an unpleasant surprise. The way it played out: Derrick gets out of car, gives hugs, and puts luggage in trunk. We get in the car, and mysterious passenger (later revealed as Sarudani) begins talking about whatever he was talking about before I arrived. Twenty minutes later, he introduces himself and keeps talking. So rather than quietly catch up with a good friend I haven't talked to in awhile, I get to listen to "What games do you like? I like these!" for an hour and a half. So THAT'S what the looks in the rearview mirror were for!

Anyway, so we arrive at the Party House(r) and are greeted with beers and hugs, as befits friends you've not seen in a long time. Witty banter all around, Guitar Hero, and crowding around the guy with the WotLK beta key's computer followed. I drank too much and did not eat enough, so I did a lot of sitting and bad pool-playing/GH3-strumming and went to bed around 4 am.

Friday we drove to Toronto and took a walking tour with Kludge and Derrick leading the way. We went up in the CN Tower for awhile, which was wonderful. We went outside on their observation tower and I got to watch planes take off and land for a bit. There were some groups sailboats and kayaks as well that looked to be either tour groups or training classes, so I watched their progress across the lake. It was super relaxing. We then headed to a very interesting dining experience that had the potential to be dangerously expensive. Luckily, I found a couple other people to split the $9 crepe with. It was quite delicious, but not quite delicious enough for $9. After that we got on back to the cars and went back to Houser's to pass out from exhaustion. Deeeelicious exhaustion.

Saturday was treetop trekking, which was my favorite of our excursions. We spent four hours climbing around in trees, 30+ feet in the air. As sore as I still am, it was exhilarating and I wish I could do it every weekend. It was just like a challenge course, but without the teambuilding. I think at one point I threatened to stab Sromkie in the face if he tried to get on the guy wire at the same time as me. I managed to not fail at ziplines, which was a relief, because as you know I get cranky when I look like a retard on accident. Everyone was pretty tired after that, so we came back to base and napped hardcore before Houser's birthday bash in the evening. Kludge cooked burgers, and Kailen drank tequila. Good times had by all, but another late night.

Sunday was fairly low key, and we didn't do anything until noon or so. That was the day we went to The Ex in Toronto instead of going to Canada's Wonderland. I know Houser was disappointed! He wanted an excuse to ride the new ride. But anyway, we went, we ate gyros sold by the least friendly people in the world, and I rode the ferris wheel for a nice relaxing view of the city amid the chaos of the Ex. When finished, we trekked back to the base once more for some more low-key drinking and Munchkin-playing.

Monday, Tam, Marnas, and Cardesh went to Niagra falls while the rest of us got up late and readied ourselves for Niall's pool party. We got to meet Niall and Susa's bebe and watch Derrick's kid do adorable things like shout in Japanese and leap into the pool with giant floaties on this tiny arms. Talk about cute overload. But yeah, it was a relaxing afternoon of eating, swimming, sunbathing, playing Munchkin, and watching Niall kick everyone's butts at chess. I believe the phrase "f*** his s***" up was used in the Niall/Derrick game in reference to what was about to happen to poor Derrick's pieces when he got up to use the restroom. I don't know if any s*** was ever f***ed up, but I do know that Niall won. After one last group photo, we booked it back to Houser's for one last game of Munchkin and a BSG season 2 marathon. By that, I of course mean disc one of season 2, because by the time we got started it was late and everyone was tired.
:D!

Tuesday was breakfast, hugs, and going to the airport to come home. Nothing spectacular there. Got home fine, picked up a very happy-to-see-me doggie, and went home for snuggling and sleeping. An excellent vacation, if exhausting. Now it's back to the grind, and I'm approaching a quarter life crisis. Awesome!

Let's exercise. It's been too long.

"Fool!" Dr. Klein spat. "I told you to have everything taken care of by the time I arrived. If Meredith sees this mess she'll--"

"I'll what, love?" Meredith strode into the room. "Kill you? No, darling, I care little for your ... experiments. Just see that it's clean for the party tonight." Dr. Klein seethed quietly and turned away from his wife. Dr. Klein's befuddled assistant, Horace, started after him quickly, glancing back in time to see the tail of Meredith's cocktail dress flow around the door frame and disappear. Palpable disdain and the faint scent of her perfume lingered after she was gone, and provided Horace with the motivation to continue his work with the Doctor. Breathing deeply, his thoughts drifted after Meredith down the hall.

Dr. Klein's presence could not be ignored for long, however, and Horace snapped to his side to begin the duplicitous task of assuaging his master's anger. A long day ahead, and it would not be pleasant.

The internet, she is full of bees

Okay, so I'm not going to talk about bees. Instead, at the behest of a friend, I am going to explain to you situations in which I think racism is comedy.

Scenario 1:

Black guy: You there! You opened your door into my car and scratched the paint on purpose! You did it because I am black!
White guy: Sir, I have never seen you before in my life.
Black guy: I'm calling my lawyer!

Scenario 2:
Hispanic woman: Excuse me sir, can you tell me how to get to the bank buildling?
White guy in suit: Why do you assume I know where all the banks are? Is it because I'm a white guy in a suit? You assume I'm some big shot just because of my race? SCREW YOU, I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY IN THE BANK!
Hispanic woman: Thanks;I'll just ask that cop over there.

Scenario 3:
White guy in airport to wife: Gosh honey, look at all the terr'rists!
Iranian wife: I hate you.

unF unF unF unF

Dance until you pass out. That's my motto from now on at any live Armin Van Buuren shows. What do you even call a techno show? Is it a rave? There were certainly ravers present. I'm pretty sure the table next to us was doing drug deals.

I thought I had "slutted" myself up enough with a somewhat low-cut shirt, but I was NOTHING compared to some of the shit we saw. Scrawny, coked-out hooker-looking girls were everywhere, including one dressed in what looked to be a pink Lum outfit. The anime convention is next month, sweetie.

That said, the show was AMAZING. The first two DJs were mildly interesting, but it is obvious whose name was on the tickets: Armin Van Buuren. I'm amazed how into the music I get when it's live. I can listen to A.S.O.T. all day long and just perk my ears up every now and again, but play the same tunes live, and I'm raptly fascinated by everything coming from the speakers.

Unfortunately, I don't think there were enough people cheering, nor was the venue completely full, so I'm not sure he'll ever come back. Oh well, at least I got to see him once :)!

He uses it in the bathtub...

I'm talking about the word "eureka," which has been attributed to Archimedes when he stepped into his bathtub and discovered water displacement. ::themoreyouknow::

I somewhat hope the idea for the show Eureka (on the Sci Fi channel). How in the world did this show go under my radar for 2 seasons? The third season starts tomorrow. OI!

Basically, it's a show about a town full of geniuses who mostly all work for Global Dynamics, a mega-corporation that develops new and crazy technology for the greater good. Among the things we saw in yesterday's marathon (I have things I could be doing, but I am VERY lazy): dimensional rift to heaven, an airborne love potion that makes all the women want the sheriff, an invisibility potion that kills, and cryogenics. Throw in a sheriff and his daughter, neither of whom are geniuses, and enjoy the comedy. It's sort of a drama, but more like a sitcom, but an hour long sitcom. It's funnier and not as dramatic as BSG, so it'll be a nice distraction while I wait for the rest of that.

Lewis Black's show was last night, and it was not at all his best performance. The opening act was half an hour long and was followed by a nearly 30 minute intermission. Uncle Lew had a few really hilarious jokes, but nothing as gut-busting as the last show. He's more a political comedian now than he used to be, and it is for that reason that I will have to leave him behind as my favorite comedian. I'm sorry, Mr. Black, but I just don't like politics.

And I'll whisper, "No."

OMGOMGOMGOMG Watchmen trailer was awesome last night. I mean .... the Batman movie was great too, but OMGOMGOMG Dr. Manhattan is absolutely perfect. The Comedian is spot on. Rorschach's mask is just right. The scene on mars with the thing and the pointy shinies and the pretty lady and the AAAAAAHHHHHH I NEED IT NOW.

It was really more a teaser than a full trailer, but there was enough of it to make me AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Chrissie and I squealed and held onto each other for fear our squeals would carry us away into the heavens. But anyway yes. I am slightly regretful that I went to the Batman movie at midnight last night, as I did not get home until well after 3 am. Luckily, my dog had been sleeping by the door so I basically just scooped her up into bed and passed out without incident. Boy am I tired. I'm not pass-outy, just loopy and feel like I'm on something. Thank goodness for half-days.

Everyone's a little bit racist!

So Friday, Sal, Chrissie, and I met a racist old woman. She referred to black people as the N-word, and as "big ape-men." How ... quaint... Oi. She was super nice other than that. Nothing terribly interesting other than that for Friday...

Saturday was the busiest day ever. Pedicure/manicure to get ready for Avenue Q and mah pretty black dress, then I had a few minutes to chill before I met Chappaboogie for lunch at the Gallery Art Cafe, which is now open on the weekends! Yay! We then went to see Hellboy 2, which was pretty badass. Thoroughly impressed. Yes.

Following the moviefilm, I dropped my darling Chappaboogie off and headed to my tiny hovel to change into my fancydress for the evening's performance. I really didn't have much time to sit and relax before it was time for dinner. PF Chang's served some delicious food, and after a drink at 8.0, we headed to Bass Hall for deliciously vulgar puppetry in the show Avenue Q. I rather enjoyed it, but it was still a musical. Highlights included: The Internet is for Porn and Everyone's a Little Bit Racist. Detractions include: dragging plot at times, loud drunk bitchfaces who kept singing along with all the songs. Die please. ::smile::

Okay, I keep getting distracted by pesky ol' WORK, sooo I'll be goin now. Later, folks.

Explosions both great and small

Ahhh fireworks. Greatest of all Chinese inventions. That might be a lie.

So what is new? Oh! I got to experience the magic of terrifying explosions set off just a few feet from my chair. That was a first. I still have no idea what any of the fireworks are called, but the show was fun just the same (except for the REALLY BRIGHT and REALLY LOUD fireworks). I also got to take Maizieface to my parents' new lake property and she seemed to have a good time! So yes! Thursday and Friday check!

Saturday, my pals and I went to see Wanted and enjoyed dinner and bowling after. Rather expensive evening, but mostly worth it. Wanted wasn't so much GOOD as hilarious. I laughed quite a bit. Hooray for laughing!

Sunday I rearranged my living room and played lots of videogames. Whee. I like the result. It's much more viewer-friendly, and now people don't have to sit in awkward positions to see my computer screen from the couch. Go go anime-party? Well no... I wouldn't make anyone squint at the subtitles on my monitor. It's 20'', but my TV is much bigger. Then again, my computer is widescreen!

And finally, I think I'm buying a condo. Screw yardwork. I mean, a yard would be great for Maizie, but the more she's outside, the more fleas I'll have to pick off ...

Anyway, it's meeting time here at work. Thanks for reading the rambles of an insane person. BYEEE!

Glug glug, squish squish.

Jellyfish!

I saw some! Over there! Guys? Hey guys?

I discovered my limit for prolonged activity in the heat: it is 1.5 hours at an aquarium. The Dallas World Aquarium has a lot of nifty things, and I enjoyed it quite a bit. However, remind me not to cut it quite so close next time. Call me crazy, but I really like having solid plans. I liked the idea of riding to Dallas on the train to go to the aquarium for Chappaboogie's birthday. Instead, our friend decided we were to drive in her new Hybrid car, which would have been fine except for 1) people are never on time, 2) we had to meet later anyway, and 3) there was random bridge construction on the way to Dallas. We arrived around 2:30 pm, parked, and stood in line for 30 minutes. Once we got in to the aquarium, it went pretty fast and we were out of there by a few minutes after 4. I walked in my apartment at 5:09 (I timed it), took Maizieface for a brisk walk (5:29), hopped in for a rinse in the shower (5:35), put down some food for Maizieface (5:37), threw on some clothes (5:44) and makeup (5:45), and hopped in the car (5:49). It takes approximately 15 minutes to get to Frye's apartment, and I arrived just two minutes after six. We then hopped in HIS car and made it to BJ's Brewhouse to join our xeno crew for dinner and then bowling.

That's my heroic tale. This weekend is fireworks and food. Next weekend is Avenue Q!

Shut up already!

With the sales of the RadioShack waterfront campus to Tarrant County College, employees in attendance at yesterday's company-wide meeting asked only the most pertinent questions:

Will we still have nacho Friday?
Can I still have a chair?
When TCC moves in, will we still have air conditioning?
Will we still be allowed to turn on the lights?
Can we still use the E-mails?
What will happen to the internet box?
Can I still drink whiskey at my desk?
If I enroll in classes with TCC, can I use the restroom facilities?

As you can see, employees have priorities strictly in order. Unfortunately, fearless leader Julian Day was unable to answer these questions in spite of their obvious importance. Answers to these questions after a word from our sponsors.

Still not much to report.

Played PowerStone last Saturday night with Brian and Cody.

Now I have sinus problems for the second time this year, and have decided to break down and go to the doctor tomorrow. The human body is both awesome and craptastic. Boo for germs.

I haven't got much to report at the moment, but I would like to mention briefly that I CRAVE Indian food again. I miss its gentle caress as it slides into my mouth.

Also, I'd like to introduce you to de-rez. Oh my.

A-Kon 19 = Success!

Mornin', Internets. It's Monday, and I don't want it to be Monday. I'd like it to still be Weekend, so I could spend a bit longer at A-Kon.

As my new profile pictar suggests, I ran into Nabeshin (Watanabe Shinichi) in the Komik market, and poked Cody until he got off the phone and got in the picture. Well, originally I just wanted him to TAKE the picture, but Nabeshin's translator/PR agent/bodyguard/adorable tag-along grabbed the camera and shoo'd him into the picture. For a quick, 3 second pose, I'd say it turned out well.

I bought some new anime to review, took some notes at some panels, and generally laughed at those standing in long lines for concerts and the like. I also laughed at the pre-reg people (sorry, Cody) who stood in the longest line ever. I got my 3-day badge in about 40 minutes, but pre-reg line took about an hour and a half. SUCKAS!

But anyway, I placed some flyers here and there at the con, and hopefully my podcast will see more pageviews for it. I hear that's the money-maker. Pageviews. Wheee! BYE!

Most awkward audition ever

Well it's been more than a week since I tried my throat at voice acting, and let me tell you...it was the most awkward thing in the world.

I was told to park at the left door, so that's what I did. The guard inside was unhelpful at best, and didn't give a crap whether I knew what was going on or not. Apparently, a little binder at the entrance was supposed to give me character background and a head start on the lines. I wasn't informed of this, so how was I supposed to know that the binders were for me, right? The guard notices me still sitting in the main lobby, and tells me to go in the other room. There should be a lady I can talk to about where to go from there. Weeeelll when I went in the "other room," I discovered it was actually a big empty warehouse with sound studios in rooms off to the sides. All the doors were closed, so as I walked loudly (I had on heels) to the center of the room, I couldn't help but wonder when they'd release the lions.

Eventually, a guy came out and asked if he could help me. It was the kind of condescending "can I help you?" that you get from all employees at the super market, but I told him why I was standing in the middle of the room and he, with a laugh, instructed me where to wait for the audition lady. At this point I should mention that he was kind of ... unprofessionally dressed: long hair with ponytail, t-shirt, and somewhat messy jeans. I'm standing there dressed for an interview. I guess Funimation really is laid back.

And so I sat. I stared at the tree outside the tinted window; I squinted to see across the dark warehouse; I watched a couple of people come out of a room and completely ignore my presence. My "buddy" from before walked through and waved at me at one point. Finally, a door at the far end of the room opened and a woman in jeans and a T-shirt came out to greet me with a fake British accent. I know it was fake, because when I couldn't understand her, she turned it off.

From that point it should have been less awkward, but it wasn't. I went in to this room with a soundproof booth. I could hear them only through headphones. I was told to tell them my character and get going. It was at this point I learned about the mysterious books at the entrance. Joy. I'd been sitting for 15 minutes with nothing to do, and now I only have about 30 seconds to prepare my characters. Suffice to say, at this point any calmness I had went right out the window, and I'm pretty sure the audition was utter crap. At the end, I expected some kind of "we'll let you know" or "hey thanks for coming in. don't worry, everyone is nervous at their first audition" buuuut all I got was a "Great! Have a good evening."

Oi.

Fun summer coming up. Memorial Day grilling, A-Kon, Avenue Q, Lewis Black, and hopefully some swimming at a lake (or at the very least, someone's apartment complex pool).

In final news, I'm going to lose 5-10 pounds by the end of summer. I'm going to Toronto over labor day and I absolutely must be the prettiest girl at the party. Yes yes.

Oh yeah, my ME blog...

I've been so busy lately it's hard to focus on anything! LET'S GLOOVY!

So I have now finished three "TheGirlNerd" podcasts. I'm excited about being TheGirlNerd. Now I need to figure out how to get listeners. There are anime podcasts that have been around a LOT longer than me, and who have more than just the one cohost. What I need to do is get a roommate or boyfriend or something who likes anime, and who I can goad into doing the podcast with me and Alex. Hmmmm.... HMMMMMM....

ALSO I have an audition with Funimation on Monday night for a voice acting opportunity (I mentioned it last time) and I am what you might call beside myself with excitement. I'm putting myself on a weekend voice regimen to ensure optimum voice quality. ::science::

I think I'm the only dork on the planet who hasn't seen freakin Iron Man yet, but with any luck I'll be going tomorrow night with some pals! I am going to try to focus on my last 2.5 hours of work. BYE!

I've been busy lately! After receiving the news that my friend was leaving her husband, most of my friends decided that said husband needed cheering up, so I spent way too much time with a beer in my hand over the last week. I need to find a bar as awesome as Gingerman, but with regular alcohol selections. Beer is tasty, but a bit filling.

Friday I saw that Jet Li/Jackie Chan movie (I refuse to care enough to remember the title), and Saturday I spent 5 ish hours wandering around at Scarborough Faire. It was as interesting and weird as ever. I think I was most entertained by the acrobat dude. Dan something or other. He had a couple of particularly amusing statements that had me giggling uncontrollably. "There are only a few performers in the world who do this stunt. Two of them are little Chinese fellows. The only difference between them and me is that they don't have a choice!" Teehee!

So anyway, after that, I joined my friends at Gingerman. What started out as just a few friends turned into 3 tables full of people.

The real news, however, is that I might have an "in" to the world of voice acting, or at least an "in" to the world of anime distribution. Wish me luck!

That's all for today. Seeya!

The best laid plans of mice and....

Good morning, blahg readers (all two of you). I'm just writing in to report the acquisition of a new family member. Maizie! She's the little puppeh in my profile picture. She's so cute. Scared of everything, but super cute. She's getting over her shyness, and her idea of playtime is to rub her face all over my hand while I attempt to scratch whatever surface is available.

In between puppy snuggles and kisses, I've been working on my next podcast. Be prepared for two fairly crappy reviews. Sad to say I did not like EITHER of the shows I reviewed this time.

Oh the Meat-manity!

Yay! I forgot to post about this earlier, but I've had an exciting dining experience!

As you may or may not know, everyone's good friend Russ came back from Japan last week. By way of reintroduction to Fat American Society, my friends and I decided to take him to Texas de Brazil. If you don't have a clue what that is, allow me to simplify with a picture.

Ahem. MEEEEEEEAT. I stole that image from some website, but just look at that meat! It comes on giant skewers. Basically it works like this.

1. Order drinks
2. Procure 'salad' from 'salad bar' (it's got sooooo much weird delicious food unlike a normal salad bar)
3. Consume salad and little bread puffy things
4. Dismiss salad plates to waitstaff
5. Receive big white empty plate
6. Flip magical card from red to green
7. Receive meats
8. Consume meats
9. Optional: consume dessert
10. Journey home
11. Sit on the couch
12. Repeat after me: "Buuuuuuuuuh"

Such an awesome meal. I wish I'd had a bigger appetite, because I don't feel my gluttony was quite up to snuff that day. Everyone else was in rare form, overeating like champions and admitting defeat only after a few buttons had popped off of their shirts. So Russ? Welcome back to the U.S., where the people are fat and happy, and the meat flows like water.

Just a sweet transvestite...

That's right! The Eddie Izzard show was last night. Everyone's favorite NOT GAY British transvestite was on top of his game last night. Here's a brief review:

Eddie started out by engaging the crowd, asking them questions in what he called "reverse school." ("You tell me the answer, and I say it back to you as if I knew it all along!") He had us all rolling right off the bat. One of the greatest things about the show is that there were NO OPENING ACTS. We paid $50 to see Eddie, and Eddie is who we saw. He wasn't dressed in his ladyclothes last night. He looked quite handsome sporting his manly attire. I presume he was dressed that way to associate himself with his role on that show where he plays a con artist or whatever. Another theory is that the transvestite bit wasn't as "shocking" anymore, and he didn't need it to get our attention, since he's already sold out TWO Dallas shows.

Anyway, he's a master of distracting himself, and making it hilarious for all. He started to look up "Dallas" on wikipedia to find out what it meant, but someone in the audience started shouting out that it's Scottish for "resting place," which I'm fairly sure is utter bullshit :D! Later in the show, he pulled out his magical phone to find out where St. Patrick was really from, because someone in the audience insisted he was English, and Eddie insisted he was Welsh. Both were incorrect, and it turns out he was actually from Gaul! Eddie's remark? "Oh. *small sigh* He was French."

He covered every topic imaginable, but the overarching theme he had to keep reminding himself to focus on was the rise of civilization and religion. A few of the more memorable jokes included Why Ducks don't Rule the World, Darwin's theory of Evolution ("Monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey, YOU!"), and "Badgers can't be choosers! *groans from audience* Oh fuck you!"

One of the best things about the show was actually the hecklers. The first one got the response, "Wow that one's kind of a non-sequitur. Look man, if you're going to heckle, you at least need to come in on track." To each heckler following, he would point at them, and then point to that first lady, and say "I can't repeat my jokes, but go join that one."

I hope those of you who haven't seen him live get a chance to see him someday. It's a great show, and it was totally worth spending a little extra for awesome seats. (Right at the front of the balcony, so no tall people in front of me!)

It's actually just a two-day weekend...

Good morning, nonexistant readers.

I went and saw Four Day Weekend on Friday night, and they were the funniest I'd seen in quite some time! The show is very hit-or-miss, as they are improv comedy and will not always be on their game. They had a lot of fun at some audience members' expense, including a very weird bachelorette party in the front row, and a very loud, penis-obsessed drunk man in the back of the room. I say weird bachelorette party because, though they were drinking from glow-in-the-dark penis straws (it was a penis-themed evening all around), they were generally quiet.

The 4DW guys did a great job of incorporating rude people into the act. During the COPS parody, two GUYS got up to go to the bathroom (or get more beer, who knows) and ran directly across in front of the skit. Rather than ignore it or get flustered, the guys in the "car" pretended that they hit two pedestrians and had to call it in to the station. As if by magic, the location of the "disturbance" was the insurance company Afflac (audience members write nouns on sticky notes for the performers to use, and Afflac was drawn at the start of the scene) so they got to make jokes about needing insurance to cover the wreck they just had with "two stupid pedestrians." When the guys came back in from the bathroom/bar, the lighting guy spotlighted them alllllll the way back to their seats :D!! I feel sorry for their dates.

Anyway, I highly recommend going to one of their shows if you haven't been before. It's a great place to go with a group of friends or with a date...just be prepared if the spotlight hits you! ;)

Tonight is Eddie Izzard, and in spite of my sickness, I am going to go. Expect a review soon!

I can't remember...

Friday night I went out with the girls to an Indian restaurant in Fort Worth. That's right! I went to the no-no place on Brian's list. I don't know what's wrong with Brian. That place is fantastic! The Naan was fluffy delish, the dipping sauces tasted fresh, and the Chicken Korma was absolutely excellent. I think Shannon and I were the only ones who had previously tasted the awesomeness that is Indian food, so we got to look like know-it-alls. Now that I know it doesn't suck, I'm going to go there all the time, whenever I can.

Delicious, delicious Indian food. ::drool::

Now I just have to convince everyone to go out to the new place Brian found in Plano. And by that I mean I need to get him over the idea of going out to eat with a female friend who isn't his wife. He got all upset last time. Then again, his wife was calling it a date. I'd probably be flustered, too.

So yes! After that, three of us drank wine and watched Youtube videos at Shannon's apartment. Exciting.

Still awaiting puppeh...but otherwise life is good!

FLAKEbook

Well, last night was supposed to be super cool. My lady friends and gentleman friends were all going to get together at the gingerman for a drink and a sammich. Unfortunately just me and my gentleman friends arrived, so as usual, I was the only girl in a sea of men. One friend was vocally and loudly upset about there being no "tail" present.

Now you might be thinking: Threnodee...why are you so upset to be surrounded by men? The problem is not that there were a lot of guys there, but that all my female friends completely bailed. The ones who said "yes I will be there" did not show up. The one whose Birthday I was trying to celebrate did not show up. I can only assume that unless I text message people MANY DAYS in advance, they will not show up. If I message people on Facebook, they will not show up.

It's just hypocritical. I'm told of a party an hour and a half before it starts and I'm to drop all prior plans and go, but when I try to plan a day in advance, no one can come? I don't think so. Anyway, I just had to rant a little. My throat hurts and I'm feeling like crap.

I slept on a pillow once.

So the pillows played in Austin at SXSW last night.

THE PILLOWS PLAYED IN AUSTIN. Ahem. So we got there 4 hours early, as originally planned, but there was exactly NO activity out in front of the Elysium, so we popped next door to grab a beer and listen to live music. Every so often we ventured outside (you could come and go if you were over 21) and wandered the streets of downtown Austin. There were more men than women in tight pants. This is a problem.

Anyway! We ended up going to stand in line at the Elysium about an hour and a half or so early. At some point, I bought falafel for myself and Frye. THEN, a PR lady for the pillows came out with a video camera and asked Frye and me some questions.

FINALLY, we got to go inside. The bands were all very good, but the Emeralds and the pillows rocked the hardest. Of those two, the pillows were the best, of course.

In the hours preceding the pillows' performance, we saw several bands play. During the set a couple of hours before the pillows went on, I turned and surveyed the crowd to see how many people were there. As I turned, I spotted Manabe (that's right, Manabe) leaning against a pillar RIGHT BEHIND ME!!!!!!!11111one

I did what any self-respecting fan would do. I bought him a beer. He laughed and thanked me for it. I didn't go all fangirly and squealy. That doesn't do any good for anyone. I simply gave him the beer, and went to reclaim my own pillar. Inside, I was repeating "oh my god oh my god oh my god" for about 15 minutes. Then, after Frye disappeared to go sit down for a bit, Sawao stood next to me for almost an entire set. Again with the inside "omgomgomgomg." At the end, as everyone was cheering for an encore, I moved to the back so i could see, but lean against the wall and get some air. Standing right in front of me was Kazuya, lead singer of the Emeralds. I took a moment to shake his hand, bow, and say "anata no ongaku wa sugoi desu. arigatou gozaimasu." He smiled, clasped my hand in both of his, and gave me a quick head bow before the pillows again graced us with their presence on stage. I'm still reeling from the energy of that night. Oh man. Too bad I didn't have more cash to buy more music from the other bands, though. There were some really good ones!

Suffice it to say, for now, that it was an awesome show in every way, and well worth the time and money spent.

Way to further the Irish stereotype...

Good morning, internet-ziens! It's a mighty PAYDAY and I'm flush in the pocket once more. I've also discovered that I am finally completely financially stable, and do not have to rely on my parents for one single iota of money. That said, I will forever be in their debt for helping me to not be in student-loan-hell, and for teaching me the correct way to accrue money.

This weekend is going to be packed full of stuff. Tonight is St. Patty's day drinking celebration. My favorite band, "the pillows," is playing in Austin tomorrow. Sunday I get to go meet my future dog!

The excitement just doesn't stop! I can barely sit still at work today. Wheeeee! I did not need that caffeine...

Leap for joy!

Happy Leap Year/Friday/Pay day!

According to my Google Calendar, the next Friday leap day will be in 2036. According to some other website on the interwebs, it will be in 2408. I am not sure who is right, but I told my coworker we could start a bet. If he is still here (read: if I am dumb enough to stick around) in 2036, and I am wrong, I will probably owe him some moneys.

In the meantime, today is a beautiful day, and I aim to get out in it. At some point. Maybe. If I can convince myself to disappear from work early. I think I can.

Also, zombie party tonight, and surprise party tomorrow! It will be a good weekend.

Luck 'o' the Pot

Saturday night, my friends and I decided to hold a Potluck. The theme was generally Asian, but we got a variety of things. There were chicken wings seasoned with unagi and teriyaki sauce (AMAZING), savory beef chunks with a citrus kick, some fried sushi rice, ramen salad, and some bowls of mousse for dessert! Mmmmmmm.

Ok really that's all I had, but I wanted to brag on my friends for creating an amazing meal! No one reads this anyway, so really I just wanted a record of the awesomeness that is our Potlucks....

Greasylicious

With only a couple of days left in January, I realize I've neglected my blog. I'm bad at blogs. But here goes.

Do you enjoy the delicious foodstuffs known as Chicken Carbonara? It comes in sandwich form from Quizznos, and a little while ago, I discovered its best form yet. Pizza.

A local place known as Rocco's Wood Fired Pizza specializes in weird pizzas, one of which is my favorite Chicken Carbonara. It's got chicken, bacon, onions, and a cheesy alfredo-y sauce that's just to die for. It's so full of grease, but it is a good treat every once in awhile. Rocco's also boasts some other interesting flavors, including a salmon-topped wonder called Spago. My friends tried that one and seemed to give it favorable lip-smacks as they devoured it, so I'll go ahead and recommend that as well. I haven't really got anything else to report. I only thought of it because the last leftovers were my lunch today! Mmmmm.

Happy eating!

Play a little quieter, please.

So! Tonight was Play! at the Bass Hall. The evening started out well enough, with friends and good food at Cantina Laredo. That place is really tasty, but a little too expensive if you ask me. I give it a score of "Meeeeh try it once."

But on to the symphony. We arrived and I immediately knew I should not have come. Cosplayers. A huge group of them. Directly in front of us. There were people in all kinds of outfits: cosplay, nice dresses, suits, and yes, hoodies that said "Megatokyo" on them. My discomfort grew steadily worse as the cosplay tards mingled close to where we sat. Some passed us by, and I relaxed a little. It seems I relaxed too soon, however, because three snotty-nosed fourteen-year-old strumpet-brats in loli-goth bo-peep pieces of crap came and sat in front of us.

I tried very hard to just ignore them and listen to the pretty music, but honestly, except for Castlevania, the World of Warcraft, and One Winged Angel (and really not even that...I just love that piece), nothing the symphony played was really good enough to distract me fully from these little would-be pedo-victims. Seriously. Where. Were. Their. PARENTS!?!?!?! Did no one teach them etiquette? (Pardon) JESUS HOTEL RECEPTION CHRIST! I hope they grow up into normal humans, but by the time you spend that much on loli-goth gear, you're pretty much gone.

I try to like people. I do. But when the conductor announces Guild Wars is to replace the Silent Hill soundtrack and you scream "NOOO I WASTED ALL MY MONEY" in the middle of the goddamn symphony, I hate you. I hate you with the fiery burning passion of a thousand suns.

What was the encore? I have no idea, but I'll bet money they played One-Winged Angel again. I left before they played, because the loli-tards were screaming at the top of their lungs for the Silent Hill bullshit crappy theme music.

Great. Now I hate Silent Hill. I'm going to bed, and go away.

Poem for the pup

Gather 'round bloggers, for a story to hear
'Bout a girl and a dog and a grand New Year

Birthday parties and new years, let's celebrate right
And lift spirits and glasses all through the night.

Come along home in the wee of the morn
To find much excitement instead of expected scorn.

Wee pup was excited to see her faux-master
And tore out of her cage so that she could pee faster.

Facing the facts, the leash, and the cold of near-dawn,
The pup drags our hero out so she can sniff at the lawn.

Whereupon the morning's business is complete,
Girl falls into bed, drunk, with freezing cold feet.

She's keeping this dog for a traveling friend,
Who plans to return shortly after year's end.

But for now, while she lays, shivering cold,
This warm little pup's worth twice its weight in gold.

She jumps up for snuggles and smooches goodnight.
Then curls up below to prevent toe-frostbite.

So thanks, little pup, so cute and so dear,
Go home to your master, and have a Happy New Year.

<3